wide eyed and desire free

yewnicornsss @ 2006-03-10T23:28:00

2006-03-11T04:36:45Z

write me/send me things
I'll write back

Samantha Fox
C/O Caron Foundation
p.o. box 150
Galen Hall Road
Wernersville, PA 19565

cigarettes will be much thanked

as a side note:

yewnicornsss @ 2006-03-09T12:56:00

2006-03-09T18:25:16Z

I'm leaving saturday to go to a rehab in ~~Illinois~~ Pennsylvania.
I'll miss every one of you.

if anyone wants to see me before I leave call me and we'll hang out
4077544588

yewnicornsss @ 2006-03-08T20:34:00

2006-03-09T01:37:49Z

rehab

or not

it's all up to me
i'll miss my jon, best friend and other friends
the only reason i'd do it is not for myself
i feel that it would do nothing but take me away from my life
fuck that

EDIT
i miss my best friend, she's such a good person.
I'm seeing her friday, her birthday, no matter what.
I SWEAR KIMM BRAND

yewnicornsss @ 2006-02-28T09:12:00

2006-02-28T14:20:16Z

the cops found jon and jared in the back of the jeep yesterday morning. as for me and zack, we were in walmart and came out to see the events. we tried to get away. we thought better. five cop cars came. we left in cop cars.

zack and i had a job at ron jons and jon and jared had a job at ihop if we had been able to go.

the previous night we were found by a cop, he took the license number, jon's info and half of zack's when he got an emergency call. I don't see how we could have been so lucky.

being a missing person for a week with your love is close to the best adventure ever.
for once we had made a happy little family and we were starting to make it.

i'm really scared for jon, his parents are being hard on him. hard is an understatement.

yewnicornsss @ 2006-02-20T10:16:00

2006-02-20T15:22:54Z

Moriah called me two days ago asking if I'd like to go running with her the following day. I was a bit hesitant but I accepted in hopes of clarity, a long lost friendship finally starting to bond, anything. The feelings flowing through me were surprisingly excitement along with a few scattered fears. 7:30 AM was the time which soon turned to 12 PM. Quarter past flew by with no phone call and no answer from that side. Half past, more and more.

I gave up.
Not sure if I give up yet.

so happy Kimm's such a great friend.
so happy Jonathan's my boo.

That really hurt.

yewnicornsss @ 2006-02-16T17:14:00

2006-02-16T22:21:40Z

Jonathan♥Charles
Prom soon
Summer 3 months
4 day weekend--fry my brain

i'd love some naughty salt
i'm a nicer person as a result
maybe i'll get some tonight

I really don't like limited people
I do like Kimm and Jon

I think if I were to go about OCing with Moriah I'd have to have a great amount of blow
...maybe
I don't quite know what to think of her these days

026

2005-12-11T21:15:20Z

So I'm pretty sure I'm going to send out christmas cards and stoof
and cookies for those who are fortunate enough to go to my school

Gimme yo address if you dig
or just be like HEY SAM, COOKIE!

025

2005-11-27T16:41:00Z

TOP 8

1. Jon
2. Kimm
3. Desi
4. Jello
5. Ally
6. SamNotFox
7. Moriah
8. Ana

Is number 2 your best friend?
I would say yes if we hung out more. I definitely consider her one of my two favorite girl friends.

Are you in love with number 8?
Love but not in love

Have you lied to number 4?
not at all

Do you know a secret about number 7?
many

Describe the relationship between number 8 and number 5.
friends, not BEST, but they talk. Ana tends to talk to 42985793487 people.

Whats the best thing about number 1?
everything,
but cliche answers aren't meant for this.

What is the worst thing about number 6?
bitchiemcsarcastic love ♥

When was the last time you saw number 5?
friday?

Describe the relationship between number 1 and number 6?
6 hates 1. 1 is good friends with 6's bee eff. 1 doesn't really care about the relationship between 1 and 6.

Have you ever danced with number 3?
drunken nights and acid trips. ♥

How long have you known number 1?
since acid trip & forever.

Have number 2 and number 7 ever dated?
I'm pretty sure 7 wouldn't like 2.

Have you ever done drugs with number 1?
why yes, yes I have.

Have you ever been in a fight with number 5?
yes, and I still have my jaw snap out of place.
very good times.

Do number 4 and number 2 like each other?
they don't know of each others existence

Does number 8 have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
yes, the world.

Have you ever been a coworker with number 7?
no

Have you ever punched number 5?
yes, quite hard in fact. She punched me back. then we laughed and repeated.

Has number 1 ever met your mother?
yes and they love each other.

Have you ever been on vacation with number 2?
if you consider opium-fest '05 a vacation then yes.

Has number 5 ever seen you naked?
yessss

Did you ever accidently physically hurt number 3?
haha noooo

How long have you known number 2?
since that incredible night at WPV when my drug addict friends who were very much on drugs started talking to her and matt about myspace. myspace topics bore quite the friendship.

How did you meet number 8?
bathroom of thelement 3 years ago when lydia was her friend.

How often do you party with number 2?
less than we should, but when we do it is pretty much the best party ever.

024

2005-11-25T21:52:58Z

I don't see why some let others treat them like shit then forgive them.
Stop it with your nostalgic portrayal of life.

I'm sorry for getting involved, but I couldn't take you being like you are anymore

this is what I said to him:
"if you hurt Moriah further than you have by not coming back I will personally kick your ass. pardon my french in the previous statement.

she's quite distraught, if you could just call her and talk about water on mars or something of that sort things would be a lot calmer in the Orlando area.

and why is it that you'd act as if things were the same days after you told her you wanted a "break"? I really hope your words are honest."

I ment it to be sternly comical, please don't be too upset.

023

2005-11-20T16:02:11Z

jkhgfghhyadjsfdaghldrgoiuj;dflgknmclkghufoiesgjklfdamgndklfjioeawjfklsdmflksjgvoirwnjgpfoqwiew[0oqire90328509ewjgklxcjngvoidf

that's pretty much how I feel right now.

except for this great amount of happiness with Jon.
Desi is pretty much the closest thing I have to a best friend (aside from Jon) in this moment. I think I'll call her today.
Yesterday was amazing, though it ended in quite the quarrel.
Harry Potter is worth the 3 hours of your life.
Millenia mall with Shea, Mikaela(sp???), and Jon of course! I still can't believe I hung out with Shea after all these months.
Left before 8 to pick up Joseph for Priscilla's party thing which Jon and I couldn't go to because... well... no $$. So we just got McDonalds and got a cake for her.

I'll post pictures later, Jon's jeep stole my camera.

022

2005-11-16T22:43:09Z

Sam Fox + New York?
Sam Fox + Jon + New York??

021

2005-11-10T22:02:05Z

we're engaged so stfu
I'll post more pictures of us & the amazing ring he got me ♥

020

2005-11-05T21:44:55Z

dated: 12/17/04
i've been walking through this home of mine, that is, what i used to call home. walking through as if i was a drifter, an outcast. the rain fell so peacefully, the tiny droplets of what used to be apart of something greater; for some reason i thought of snow, the kind that stays on your eyelashes so you can't see clearly. there was a boy; around 6 i'm guessing. this boy had a jumprope made from one of daddy's old projects, the kind that is white so it shows the dirt. he was just standing there flogging the ground with this jump rope of his and he looked at me as i passed. he stoped beating the rope at the brick road for a moment and i thought to myself "i hope he's looking, i hope he is thinking of what it must be like to be out of his immature childhood,"
So on i was through the adventure i was bound to seek eventually, well actually i was only hoping to find the place by the lake where along with a couple others used to smoke our cigarettes. of course to my luck i found the old park of the neighborhood along with the spot by the lake... completely flooded. "sigh," i thought, "off i must go then," and the thoughts continued. everywhere it seemed i had a story to go along with the places i'd pass. the place where i got my first bee sting, the place where garland cut open her foot, the place the neighborhood kids imagioned to be haunted but were too scared to walk in the backyard. now, these places, they are flooded, demolished, anything to the sort of distruction. it was sad really, all those locations ruined for the future generations. on i was to the bakery to get my daily coffee, black of course, that's the way i like it. i spotted an old friend of mine and thought it best not to stay and chat. eventually i came to a place so ordinary yet it spoke to me. that is where i've been recently. i called up an old friend and he came to comfort me. i thought about the times we had and it brought tears to my eyes. "what," he'd ask, "what's wrong? i'm here for you," if only he would understand...
And again i was off after school, on to continue my quest to find something, though i'm not sure what. i stoped by the bakery, got my coffee, but i only stayed for a minute at the place i had found the previous day. "I wonder what has become of the dock," i thought. and though i was afraid to find what would be there, i left. children all around me, screaming, crying, the guardian of them all playing football with the boys. i crawled through the fence that was conveniently bent down from the rebels at the high school who are too cool to go to class. i found the trail to the dock and i sat down, coffee and doughnuts in hand. i looked around. this is what has become of the place where we would spend those long summer days fishing and smoking? the trees had been either cut down or fallen by the recent hurricanes. there was no other place where the pot heads would smoke their marijuana. the trees had fallen in and the fence no longer hid the places. i rememberd a time back there, i remembered so much. some children called out to me. "oooh drinking my drink by the pond!!" i just looked at them and they responded to my glance with a "there are boyssss over there! oooh she's looking!!! she's fineeee!!!" i just chuckled and thought how immature those kids were.
My coffee had grown cold so i poured the remainders into the lake and stood up, took another glance, and walked off. of course the children had to comment on my sudden movement as they had commented on every movement i'd made previously. "heyy do you go to the highschool? i'm sorry we act retarded sometimes!!" i just looked at them and asked how old thery were; 10 they said. i just walked off not wanting to have them as a muse anymore.

I felt like sharing that with you all.

019

2005-10-24T16:46:13Z

So I stayed up pretty late to welcome this wonderful Wilma hurricane into my life and sit outside and get sucked away... with Mary Jane.
Not only was she late by a few hours and I didn't get to experience her greatest hour, but she caused Mary Jane to be evaporated away into the atmosphere, completely wasted and unappreciated.

018

2005-10-23T18:06:03Z

I'm pretty excited for this hurricane coming tonight/tomorrow.
sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've had little inspiration yet great need.

...the inspiration isn't there yet.

OH who wants to go to Death Cab with me? I have an extra ticket... all you'd have to do is pay for it and get us a ride back.

017.5

2005-10-11T21:23:43Z

Homecoming pictures: coming soon

017

2005-10-08T18:51:18Z

So things decided to work out great. Chris' mom was like hey I got you a personal chauffeur so he'll take you wherever whenever. So yea, that's pretty sweet. I'm getting my mom to do the last touches on my dress which is what she's doing now. Hopefully it won't be close to being done 5 minutes before I leave like last year. I didn't even finish, ew. I ran into Hannah Darden while I was looking for a hair clippie thing. She's going to homecoming also and was looking for a hair clippie thing too. Yea, not important. I'll bring my camera and post a billion pictures. this will be funnnnnnnnn! (hopefully) watch everything not go according to plan and it ends up sucking a lot a lot. oh well, me and chris are sushing at like 5.

016

2005-10-05T23:19:17Z

So this whole me and Chris getting a decent ride to homecoming isn't going so well. If worst comes to worst, he'll drive and we'll leave early. ew. He came up with the idea to take a taxi. not bad but still ew.

anyone want to hook a brotha up?

fuck this, i'll post later

016

2005-10-04T20:20:25Z

015

2005-10-02T17:00:26Z

014

2005-09-29T20:37:29Z

013

2005-09-28T21:52:43Z

Why must it take 55 minutes to deliver a pizza? ugh...
mushroom thin crust is so worth it.

Ted asked me if I have been getting enough sleep lately. I laughed at that thinking of the dreams I have had the past two nights, more so the person in those dreams. Weird. Weird. Weird. I enjoy how Ted secretly loves me and how my boyfriend noticed it. I'm sure others have too, it's kind of hard to miss. Maybe I'm crazy and making things up but it's a strong possibility.

I met someone who I've wanted to meet for a while yesterday and he was at my house. I think he was crushing on me hardcore which makes me laugh. I'd look around and noticing everything and enjoying my high... then I'd look at him and he'd be staring at me. Then another kid who I've sort of wanted to meet for a while and he was also at my house. He also kept staring at me. And this gangster boy who is in the 3rd period I had before I switched was at my house too. He saw me at a party at some hotel a few weeks ago and was telling me what was going on in his mind that night. He said how he thought I was this huge brainy girl who hates drugs and gets involved in school... then he saw me sipping on some beer and being all wasted and such. My reply to that was "yea... I'm pretty much amazing" which made everyone laugh of course. Fun day yesterday. All this fake fun is getting to my brain.

That is an interesting way to say it. "Fake fun". I like it.

download Brandon Patton right now
you can download straight from his web page:
http://www.brandonpatton.com/shouldconfusion.html

- -

2005-09-28T21:37:49Z

DOWNLOAD: Brandon Patton
& & I made a new lj layout, tell me what you think.

I think this is quite true:

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to good manners and elegance.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is 100%. You are not suited for a monogamous relationship.

You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

012

2005-09-25T15:42:04Z

Saw Corpse Bride with Chris where Vail was with Kaley and I saw a few people about the theater who I know from somewhere or another. I was expecting it to be a big disappointment, but when it wasn't... wow. John Wayne Foster saw me and screamed SAMFOX!! Thinking it was one of my close friends (because they are the only ones who don't say hey sam! or sam! but say SAMFOX!) I didn't recognize him as anyone I knew without my glasses so of course I asked "who are you?" and got closer to find John Wayne Foster with some whore girl in stupid clothing and he has shaved his head. why would anyone want to suck face with a shaved john wayne? oh wait, she's a whore. never mind. SO THEN WE WENT TO SONICS where I was all excited to have one of those cookie dough blasts BUT they don't have them anymore. bummer. Then sleep happened after I got home of course. I didn't have anything to do Saturday so I put up an away message saying WHO WANTS TO GO SHOPPING?!? and the dearest Moriah-Moriah answered my call. and we hung out. and I missed her. and we're friends again. and we got cute things. I completely forgot about babysitting until Moriah was like "oh it's almost 7:30 I think I have to go." and I was like SHIT!! and ran out the door. Babysitting was much fun, the boy Sam was so amazing. We watched Peter Pan and he is such a classy boy. Off to break some hearts soon. Chris <3, Papi, Mickey, and Daniel White stopped by while they were on their egging adventure. They paid me $40 to watch this kid for 4 hours. Amazing, yea?

So that's my weekend and what a weekend it was. and someone should tag me for that 20 things you don't know about me thing.
I'm screaming and I can't let myself out without it.

Spell Check words for "SamFox" - SAM FOX, SAM-FOX, SUFFIX, SMOGS, SEMTEX, SMILAX, SMACKS, SMOCKS, SMUGS, SMOG'S, SMURFS

011

2005-09-22T01:24:17Z

I'm not a "party girl" like my family thinks I am. It hurts when Lydia says that I'm meant to have her mom and I'm like her mom, because I'm not. I hate drugs. I hate most people who do drugs. I'm a god damn hypocrite yet I'm not at all. I'm not even bad about my drug use. I don't know where I'm going with that... I guess I'm just pondering? whatever

I think I'm going to tell him Saturday. or Friday. or get really close and not say anything at all.

I hung out with Kim on Saturday. I want to get closer with her, she's an amazing person and I loved every moment of our awesomeness. From bowling to stealing bowling shoes to smoking at the skate park, it was ALL GROOD. oh && ROCKY HORROR! There's nothing like smores and transvestites to end the night... well... start the drinking.

Chris is amazing and we like to hot tub at least once a week (usually Sunday night).

I am drawing the anonymous post card. Post anything you want: a confession, a story, an opinion, a secret, something about you, how you feel about me, about anyone/anything at all. There's no possible way to track the comment back to its owner, so there's no reason to not be 100% honest. Please comment, it's always interesting to hear what you all have to say about everything, especially when it's true.